I don't like it when someone tells me I can't do something. I really don't like to be questioned, and when I am questioned, I tend to question right back. You know what's funny about this whole issue with people telling me I can't do something? I'm the guiltiest of them all!
I normally have a very optimistic attitude. I see the good in people. It surprises me sometimes how quick people are to put others down. Now, I'm not saying I don't enjoy gossip. I do. I especially enjoy the gossip which I am not a part of. I just don't like to flame people... well, there are a select few... but I do believe in respecting others.... now onto myself...
I was talking to my husband tonight about my book. We were talking about how authors have deadlines. I have read celebrity blogs stating that they have to have their book written by blah blah blah blah blah blah blah. The difference between them and I? They can write ANYTHING! I mean ANYTHING and have it instantly published. I have no one telling me I need to have it done by a particular date, nor do I know if my work of (what I call) art will even be published. I could assign a completion date myself, but instead, guess what I'm telling myself? You betcha! "You can't do that Kell... you have way too much going on"... bad self-talk I tell ya... positive affirmations gone... right out the window!
I find it much easier to sit down to my blog each evening. It's partially the instant gratification... and partially the fellowship. Of course I always feel prouder than proud after certain posts, and a little unsure after others. I'll feel unsure tonight. Give me some IG (instant gratification), K? ;)
I am quite sick and tired of holding myself back. I procrastinate. While I'm known at work and at home for being giddy, silly and fun, I am not known for my close attention to details and deadlines. I'll work on this. I'll work on my book. I do believe I need to purchase a chalk board and write that 1,000 times. Of course, that would just give me one more excuse not to sit down with my book... more procrastination.
This is going to take a lot of effort on my part... I mean A LOT! I need to believe in myself... believe that I can make this happen, and quit telling myself that I can't. I can! Now I'll prove it!
Showing posts with label Write. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Write. Show all posts
Friday, April 24, 2009
Thursday, April 23, 2009
The Sweetest Blessings
This blog post is proud to be linked to:
When I sit down to type a new blog entry, I often go with the feeling I am having at the moment. Yesterday's entry about the 80s and 90s was so much fun for me... and I have to admit, I'm extremely amused with the feedback I have received following that post! I love that there are so many people out there with crazy personalities, or lots of folks who at least appreciate the maniacs out there! We appreciate your appreciation! :0)
Tonight I find myself feeling extremely blessed. While my three young children are tucked into their beds, sleeping soundly without a care in the world, I sit here thinking about how incredibly fortunate we are to have 3 healthy, happy, very lively children.
When I pick up the newspaper and read an obituary for a child, I immediately get choked up. I can't stand to think of little ones hurting in any way... and the realization that children truly are hurting is overwhelmingly sad. I often have the urge to turn off TV shows if they pertain to children being abused, young ones with illness, babies dying, etc. But then I realize how these stories move me to hold my children tighter, tell them I love them even more, offer hugs and kisses when they're in the mood to snuggle, and play with them when they ask. Oh, how I would regret it if I ignored a request to spend time together, and later learned that it had been my last opportunity.
My heart goes out to parents and other family members and friends who have a terminally ill child, who have to worry every day whether their little one will need to go to the emergency room or worse. It breaks my heart. I want to protect both the child and the family from their hurt and heartache, and I know that isn't possible. While miracles do happen, small blessings do pass and leave behind those who love them. It is heart-wrenching for me to think about.
Grey's Anatomy inspired this post tonight. The little girl with terminal illness who drifted off to sleep forever in her daddy's arms brought instant tears to my eyes, and an instant throb to my heart. I cannot even imagine going through something so horrible. I cannot imagine letting one of my babies go... I just can't fathom it.
This episode of Grey's has reminded me to literally count my blessings, hold them close and to never, ever let myself forget how incredibly special they really are. For the smallest blessings leave the biggest impressions on our hearts.
When I sit down to type a new blog entry, I often go with the feeling I am having at the moment. Yesterday's entry about the 80s and 90s was so much fun for me... and I have to admit, I'm extremely amused with the feedback I have received following that post! I love that there are so many people out there with crazy personalities, or lots of folks who at least appreciate the maniacs out there! We appreciate your appreciation! :0)
Tonight I find myself feeling extremely blessed. While my three young children are tucked into their beds, sleeping soundly without a care in the world, I sit here thinking about how incredibly fortunate we are to have 3 healthy, happy, very lively children.
When I pick up the newspaper and read an obituary for a child, I immediately get choked up. I can't stand to think of little ones hurting in any way... and the realization that children truly are hurting is overwhelmingly sad. I often have the urge to turn off TV shows if they pertain to children being abused, young ones with illness, babies dying, etc. But then I realize how these stories move me to hold my children tighter, tell them I love them even more, offer hugs and kisses when they're in the mood to snuggle, and play with them when they ask. Oh, how I would regret it if I ignored a request to spend time together, and later learned that it had been my last opportunity.
My heart goes out to parents and other family members and friends who have a terminally ill child, who have to worry every day whether their little one will need to go to the emergency room or worse. It breaks my heart. I want to protect both the child and the family from their hurt and heartache, and I know that isn't possible. While miracles do happen, small blessings do pass and leave behind those who love them. It is heart-wrenching for me to think about.
Grey's Anatomy inspired this post tonight. The little girl with terminal illness who drifted off to sleep forever in her daddy's arms brought instant tears to my eyes, and an instant throb to my heart. I cannot even imagine going through something so horrible. I cannot imagine letting one of my babies go... I just can't fathom it.
This episode of Grey's has reminded me to literally count my blessings, hold them close and to never, ever let myself forget how incredibly special they really are. For the smallest blessings leave the biggest impressions on our hearts.
Monday, April 20, 2009
Bad Dreams, Hot Dreams, Daydreams & Never-ending Dreams...
I started thinking about dreams tonight. I sometimes have dreams so vivid, I wake up in a sweat, thinking they were true! If I have a really good dream ;) I often think of it throughout the day, proving the fact that women think about sex just as much as men do!
I fell asleep at 8pm tonight. I just couldn't make it to bed, so I slept on the couch... all kinked up and uncomfortable, but it was much easier than starting my bedtime ritual (read recent posts for details on this topic). I just ignored it all and went to sleep... nice, distressing, awkward couch sleep.
I woke at 11pm in a daze. I dreamt that I screamed at one of my friends... I screamed at her to the point we would never be friends again. It was real. It felt real. It took me a good 20 minutes to focus enough to realize it really wasn't real. What a dream! And before 11pm, too! I wanted to call my buddy to make sure we truly were still friends. But I didn't. I know now that I will be able to tell her the full, over-the-top story tomorrow and we'll get a good laugh out of it. But tonight it's real.
When I was little I had a recurring dream. I dreamt over and over that my sister and I were playing out in the front yard. Sis was swinging and I was doing cartwheels (God, I loved cartwheels!), and this man in a station wagon (a woody) would pull up and kidnap us. It was a very vivid, chilling dream. I bet I dreamt that same dream 30 times as a child. I never looked into my dream dictionary to see what it meant. By the time I got a dictionary I was onto a new, equally frightening recurring dream...
As a teenager I would dream that I was on a freeway... a never-ending freeway. There were 2 lanes, one going in each direction with a partition. There were no exits. There were absolutely no opportunities to stop. You were forced to drive forever... forever and ever... I still think about that dream occasionally when I'm on a freeway. Thank God for exit ramps and rest stops! They were nowhere to be found in my nightmare. That's a better word for these bad dreams.
I don't normally have recurring dreams anymore. I daydream a lot. I have huge goals... goals I think of frequently and with great expectation. I like to think I've replaced the good with the bad. I've heard several times that anything is possible if you put your mind to it. I tend to agree... although some days I believe it much more than others.
So, I just looked up my recurring childhood and teenhood dreams. Being kidnapped/abducted means you are in fear of something... losing your most familiar surroundings or something close to you. That makes sense. I'm a worrier.
My never-ending road dream signifies anxiety related to "my path"... that also makes sense. I've never been 100% sure of myself or my course. Maybe it's a good sign I don't have that dream anymore!
Driving dreams also suggest a pattern in your sex-life! WOW! I won't comment on that, but WOW! That's a lot of never ending love!
Dreams can affect us in so many ways. Nightmares may stick with us throughout the day, and have an impact on everything we do that day, only to be forgotten the following day. Sweet dreams may put a spark in our step and a smile on our faces for hours or even days! Daydreams can push us forward or hold us back, depending on the subject matter. Ex. Daydreaming you are going to have wild, passionate wall sex with a famous actor may hold you back... but daydreaming about the same type of wall sex with your significant other can push your sex-life to a whole new level!
I think dreams are amazing. They are like little movies in our minds. Some are rated G, family-friendly and generally clean. Some may be PG... there may be some innuendos, but no full-blown bad language or butts hanging out. Many may be rated PG-13, (these days) you may see a butt or a boob. Bunches may be rated R, depending on how dirty-minded you are. Some may be rated NC-17, just like my website.... and I won't go on, but you get my drift...
I will continue to dream... I'm sure of it. Without the dream that I may become an author, I would have never started a blog. Without the dream that I would be able to have children, I truly believe I'd be kidless. Dreams matter... big and small. I choose to dream big!
Kelly:0)
Confession: I sometimes feel like Izzy Stevens when I blog. LOL!
I fell asleep at 8pm tonight. I just couldn't make it to bed, so I slept on the couch... all kinked up and uncomfortable, but it was much easier than starting my bedtime ritual (read recent posts for details on this topic). I just ignored it all and went to sleep... nice, distressing, awkward couch sleep.
I woke at 11pm in a daze. I dreamt that I screamed at one of my friends... I screamed at her to the point we would never be friends again. It was real. It felt real. It took me a good 20 minutes to focus enough to realize it really wasn't real. What a dream! And before 11pm, too! I wanted to call my buddy to make sure we truly were still friends. But I didn't. I know now that I will be able to tell her the full, over-the-top story tomorrow and we'll get a good laugh out of it. But tonight it's real.
When I was little I had a recurring dream. I dreamt over and over that my sister and I were playing out in the front yard. Sis was swinging and I was doing cartwheels (God, I loved cartwheels!), and this man in a station wagon (a woody) would pull up and kidnap us. It was a very vivid, chilling dream. I bet I dreamt that same dream 30 times as a child. I never looked into my dream dictionary to see what it meant. By the time I got a dictionary I was onto a new, equally frightening recurring dream...
As a teenager I would dream that I was on a freeway... a never-ending freeway. There were 2 lanes, one going in each direction with a partition. There were no exits. There were absolutely no opportunities to stop. You were forced to drive forever... forever and ever... I still think about that dream occasionally when I'm on a freeway. Thank God for exit ramps and rest stops! They were nowhere to be found in my nightmare. That's a better word for these bad dreams.
I don't normally have recurring dreams anymore. I daydream a lot. I have huge goals... goals I think of frequently and with great expectation. I like to think I've replaced the good with the bad. I've heard several times that anything is possible if you put your mind to it. I tend to agree... although some days I believe it much more than others.
So, I just looked up my recurring childhood and teenhood dreams. Being kidnapped/abducted means you are in fear of something... losing your most familiar surroundings or something close to you. That makes sense. I'm a worrier.
My never-ending road dream signifies anxiety related to "my path"... that also makes sense. I've never been 100% sure of myself or my course. Maybe it's a good sign I don't have that dream anymore!
Driving dreams also suggest a pattern in your sex-life! WOW! I won't comment on that, but WOW! That's a lot of never ending love!
Dreams can affect us in so many ways. Nightmares may stick with us throughout the day, and have an impact on everything we do that day, only to be forgotten the following day. Sweet dreams may put a spark in our step and a smile on our faces for hours or even days! Daydreams can push us forward or hold us back, depending on the subject matter. Ex. Daydreaming you are going to have wild, passionate wall sex with a famous actor may hold you back... but daydreaming about the same type of wall sex with your significant other can push your sex-life to a whole new level!
I think dreams are amazing. They are like little movies in our minds. Some are rated G, family-friendly and generally clean. Some may be PG... there may be some innuendos, but no full-blown bad language or butts hanging out. Many may be rated PG-13, (these days) you may see a butt or a boob. Bunches may be rated R, depending on how dirty-minded you are. Some may be rated NC-17, just like my website.... and I won't go on, but you get my drift...
I will continue to dream... I'm sure of it. Without the dream that I may become an author, I would have never started a blog. Without the dream that I would be able to have children, I truly believe I'd be kidless. Dreams matter... big and small. I choose to dream big!
Kelly:0)
Confession: I sometimes feel like Izzy Stevens when I blog. LOL!
Saturday, April 18, 2009
Scooters and Selfishness
Read ahead for the okay to be a selfish person...
Well, Joel has the kids outside. They have been anxiously awaiting scooter-time all day! Grammy & Papa got them the cutest scooters for Easter. Logan's is a Radio Flyer, Aiden's is Spiderman & Abbi's is Disney Princesses... imagine that!I love this, because I can watch them out the window, and see their happiness from a distance, but I'm also free to indulge in some Kelly time! It's priceless.
I was talking to someone the other day (they shall remain nameless), and this person mentioned how women can be so self-centered... spoiling themselves with extracurriculars, such as pedicures, nights out with the girls, massages, shopping after work, etc. I kept sitting there thinking, 'that is how I keep myself sane'... but I didn't say it. I just said that we all need some pampering time... some time for us.
The economy being the way it is has put a halt to some of those extracurriculars, but I still think it is so important for we, as women, to find time for ourselves, and to truly enjoy it. I'm not saying that the time we spend with our kids is not truly enjoyable... it is... but the small things we do for ourselves are the primary reasons we have happiness to share... with our kids, our spouses, our friends, etc.
Here is a list of some of the things I do for myself. Selfish or not, I truly believe they make me a more enjoyable person to be around!
1) I have my nails done every 3-4 weeks and my toes done on occasion.
2) I read... a lot. I love to read in bed with a mound of pillows and big, fluffy blankets!
3) I listen to music... a lot! I burn CD's and have music for any kind of mood. Music is one of my outlets.
4) I write. Since starting my book, and my blog, I find it to be amazingly therapeutic and fun! And the fact that people are actually interested enough to read it is a major ego boost! (so don't stop reading, k?) :)
5) I collect Betty Boop and Hello Kitty goodies. Thanks to my friend Anne, my entire desk area at work is decorated with a Betty Boop theme. It makes me happy to walk in to the activity room each day I have to work!
6) I sing. I have a karaoke page on MySpace and it is the primary reason I leave my account open. I absolutely love to sing!
7) I Facebook. It's a great way to keep in contact (or to get back into contact) with friends from school. It's also a fabulous gossip chain, whether subscribers like to admit it or not. :)
8) I enjoy a girls' night out every now & again. Drinks are optional, because we normally act & feel drunk whether we actually are or not.
9) I go on dates with my husband. Just because you get married, you don't have to stop dating ladies!
10) I take a bath when I'm extremely stressed out. A book... candles... the ultimate luxury.
I don't feel guilty (unless money is tight) and I enjoy all of these things so much, I have no desire to give them up. It may make me a little selfish, but I think we should all give ourselves the go-ahead to indulge a bit, and to let ourselves be a little self-centered now and then. Being selfless is a wonderful trait, but what's wrong with being selfless and selfish? Nothing!
Saturday, April 11, 2009
Polishing-Up
I painted nails today... lots of nails. If you were to add all of the individual nails I painted, the total would add up to well over a hundred. Many ladies now have very pretty fingernails for Easter. It's amazing how a little coat of paint can bring such huge smiles... and wonderful stories!
I remember my great-grandmothers fairly well. Great Grandma Walker never let us leave her house empty-handed. She was always armed with those little cups of ice cream and other little treats. Plus she always gave dollar bills. I remember how sweet she was. She was very loving and giving.
I also remember my Great Grandma Timson. She was a hoot! She loved shoes. She kept them in the boxes. I've always thought that it's quite odd to leave shoes in their boxes. It's similar to stuffing clothing into the bottoms of drawers you rarely open. You forget about them. Not to mention the fact that if your shoes are lined up in front of you, it's so much easier to choose a pair to go perfectly with your outfit for the day. I don't get it. Obviously Great Grandma did, but I don't.
I also remember Great Grandma Timson, Grandma Pat, Mom, Tara and I going to the jewelry store to have jewelry appraised, and going to Mansfield to shop. I always thought having jewelry appraised was strange, too. The jewelry items being appraised were obviously important to my grandmas. If they had no intention of selling them, why did it really matter how much they were worth? i never quite understood. I still don't.
Today while I was painting nails, I thought of my grandmas. I remember their funny little rituals. Grandma Timson liked to shop, shop, shop, and then return everything she bought! I wonder now if it was buyer's remorse, or if she had OCD. I imagine that was the case. If so, I know who to blame for my quirky rituals. Thanks Grandma.
I heard so many stories today. I truly enjoyed the time I spent with each of the ladies. One lady confided that she had never had her nails painted before coming to the nursing home. Another lady told me how beautiful her nails were "for such an old woman." The women who are blessed enough to go out with family for Easter services told me they feel prettier with their nails polished. It's very sweet how such a small act makes them so extremely happy.
While I was filing and painting, I realized that almost all of the women asked about my family, and how I was doing personally. One of the women even asked me how the economy was affecting our family. I was amazed how interested they were... in my life!
I realized today that the generations of people ahead of us truly care about other people. They don't anxiously wait for us to finish our stories so they can one-up us, or reply with a story of their own. They just honestly enjoy listening.
I'm guilty of jumping in on occasion. I love telling stories. I have even been known to interrupt people. How rude I've been!
I decided today that I will no longer wait my turn while someone is confiding in me or telling me a story. I will just sit back and listen, enjoying the fact that they care enough about me to share with me.
I really think that the younger population is very self-centered. Feel free to send hate mail... I realize that I'm generalizing. There are some really good younger people out there... people that care about others, and don't focus on boosting their self-esteem and crowd appeal by over-exaggerating their own life stories. There are wonderful people who don't put others down to make themselves appear superior. I just don't believe it's the majority.
I am vowing to be one of those few good people. I want to one day be remembered for how much I cared for others... not for my amped-up tales. I want to be like those ladies with polished nails. They have taught me to listen, learn and give. Taking is so overrated. I want my kids and grandkids to not only remember my crazy antics one day (although I hope they do), but also my giving spirit. That is my wish.
Sometimes we all need a little polish.
Sunday, March 22, 2009
To My Blog...
Okay, I'm gonna be completely honest here... I've been avoiding you. I'm sorry, blog, if I've hurt your feelings. Quite frankly, it annoys me that over the past 3 months, only 175 people have visited you, probably half of those visitors being me. I love you. I do. I find myself thinking about you often. I continue to read other blogs. I resume my quest for writing greatness, but I need your help!
Blog, I need you to get the word out. I need you to glitter and shine... sparkle and twinkle. I'm not yelling at you. I'm just saying I need you to step it up a bit. I'm prepared to step it up. You had better get on the stick, too!
You see, I've been having some health issues, and I have been sugar-coating things, huddled in my cozy corner of blissful denial, only I'm finding it's not quite so blissful anymore.
I'm reaching out to friends more than ever. I am learning who my true friends are, and allowing myself to realize that just because someone laughs with me and we click on a personal level, I can't always reach out to them and trust them. Some people are unable to truly care for other people. Some people are too wrapped up in their own desolation. I am now realizing that it takes a truly special individual to care on the level some of my friends care for me on. They have proven that to me over this past week.
As I continue this journey, I will continue it with you, Blog. I had an overwhelming urge to share with you today... to sit together and be together, and I will continue to sit and share with you. I'm sorry I have been avoiding you. I love you Blog. Now get a grip, quit slobbering all over yourself, share my words & get a grip... this is NOT the end of the world!
Friday, January 23, 2009
Amidst This Chaos, We Find Our Happiness
What are your quirks? Can you count them on one hand? If so, you may be one of the few luckiest folks on the planet. You are blessed. You DO NOT have ANY form of OCD. If you do have peculiarities, which take all of your apendages, along with your digits to count , you are incurable, and you may as well suck it up and deal with it. You are a neurotical freak, just like the rest of us!
I find happiness in small, medium and large, extravagant things. If you ask my friends, they will tell you that I really love pretty much everything. I love gifts, I love handwritten letters, I love mail in general, I love girls' night's out... the list could continue until your eyes bulge out of your irrational heads and you are eating paint chips just for fun.
When I'm at home, I enjoy sitting in front of the fire place, taking baths, cuddling with my babies on the couch, watching my husband play his Guitar Hero drums, napping, reading and cleaning like a bat out of hell, but only when I'm in the mood.
I LOVE vacationing, gambling, texting, date nights, a night alone at the house every once in a while... I'm really quite easily amused.
The OCD does not come through in what it is that we do, but how we go about doing it.
For instance, here I sit at 1:42am. I know I still need to take my medicine before bed, brush my teeth, put up the baby gate, check the doors to make sure they're locked, check on the boys and cover them up for the 5th time, check on Abbi and do the cover-up thing again in her room, watch the rest of Grey's Anatomy (because I promised myself some 'Me' time), read a chapter of the fabulous Jackie Collin's book my dear friend Anne loaned me, daydream, worry about money for A MINIMUM of 15 minutes, think about how I DO NOT want to go to work on a saturday, plan my saturday in my head, make a mental list for the store, which I will completely forget within 10 minutes, wonder how I'm going to get caught up on the Bachelor, the Young and the Restless (I'm behind four episodes from this week) AND get the laundry done, and clean the house. Then I'll wonder again if I locked the door, but I won't get up to check this time, because I'm absolutely exhausted. So I'll turn off the light. The baby will toddle in and crawl up in bed with me. He'll smell like pee. I'll be forced to go get a diaper and unzip his sleeper. Why don't they make those damn gowns for 2 year old boys? While I'm up getting the diaper, I'll feel compelled to check the door. Still locked! I'll change Logan. He'll snuggle with me for a maximum of 45 seconds. Back to bed he goes. I will then drift off to sleep, only to awake at 5am to both Logan AND Aiden sharing my bed, rolling around, fighting over pillows and blankets. I'll kick them (not literally. Please don't call APS) out of bed. They'll saunter off to their rooms, screaming, as if I've just told them they will never ride Papa Mike's tractor another day in their lives. I will then fall into a peaceful sleep, with dreams involving a fireman and a big hose, only to be awoken an hour and a half later, just when I'm about to ask what the big hose feels like, to screams coming from the bathroom, along with running water and three children with raisin hands, most-likely from playing in the soapy sink water for the last hour and a half.
Okay, so I strayed from the subject a little there, but if you are a Mother, I'm sure you appreciate the sentiment. My whole point being... I understand that everyone lives a frenzied life, full of ups and downs, and twists and bends, fireman and hoses, and shriveled hands and a soapless house. I make it through each and every day, and enjoy doing it, by finding the fun in every single thing I do. Embrace your life! Hold your quirks close and never, ever let them go. They make you! They are you! You are you because of your eccentricity.
No matter what idiosyncrasy arises, you will always be you. Learn what you love, learn what creates chaos in your life. Learn what to blow off, and then learn what to hold dear.
Life is a million miniscule acts combined into our own little happiness.
More Tomorrow...
Kelly :0)
I find happiness in small, medium and large, extravagant things. If you ask my friends, they will tell you that I really love pretty much everything. I love gifts, I love handwritten letters, I love mail in general, I love girls' night's out... the list could continue until your eyes bulge out of your irrational heads and you are eating paint chips just for fun.
When I'm at home, I enjoy sitting in front of the fire place, taking baths, cuddling with my babies on the couch, watching my husband play his Guitar Hero drums, napping, reading and cleaning like a bat out of hell, but only when I'm in the mood.
I LOVE vacationing, gambling, texting, date nights, a night alone at the house every once in a while... I'm really quite easily amused.
The OCD does not come through in what it is that we do, but how we go about doing it.
For instance, here I sit at 1:42am. I know I still need to take my medicine before bed, brush my teeth, put up the baby gate, check the doors to make sure they're locked, check on the boys and cover them up for the 5th time, check on Abbi and do the cover-up thing again in her room, watch the rest of Grey's Anatomy (because I promised myself some 'Me' time), read a chapter of the fabulous Jackie Collin's book my dear friend Anne loaned me, daydream, worry about money for A MINIMUM of 15 minutes, think about how I DO NOT want to go to work on a saturday, plan my saturday in my head, make a mental list for the store, which I will completely forget within 10 minutes, wonder how I'm going to get caught up on the Bachelor, the Young and the Restless (I'm behind four episodes from this week) AND get the laundry done, and clean the house. Then I'll wonder again if I locked the door, but I won't get up to check this time, because I'm absolutely exhausted. So I'll turn off the light. The baby will toddle in and crawl up in bed with me. He'll smell like pee. I'll be forced to go get a diaper and unzip his sleeper. Why don't they make those damn gowns for 2 year old boys? While I'm up getting the diaper, I'll feel compelled to check the door. Still locked! I'll change Logan. He'll snuggle with me for a maximum of 45 seconds. Back to bed he goes. I will then drift off to sleep, only to awake at 5am to both Logan AND Aiden sharing my bed, rolling around, fighting over pillows and blankets. I'll kick them (not literally. Please don't call APS) out of bed. They'll saunter off to their rooms, screaming, as if I've just told them they will never ride Papa Mike's tractor another day in their lives. I will then fall into a peaceful sleep, with dreams involving a fireman and a big hose, only to be awoken an hour and a half later, just when I'm about to ask what the big hose feels like, to screams coming from the bathroom, along with running water and three children with raisin hands, most-likely from playing in the soapy sink water for the last hour and a half.
Okay, so I strayed from the subject a little there, but if you are a Mother, I'm sure you appreciate the sentiment. My whole point being... I understand that everyone lives a frenzied life, full of ups and downs, and twists and bends, fireman and hoses, and shriveled hands and a soapless house. I make it through each and every day, and enjoy doing it, by finding the fun in every single thing I do. Embrace your life! Hold your quirks close and never, ever let them go. They make you! They are you! You are you because of your eccentricity.
No matter what idiosyncrasy arises, you will always be you. Learn what you love, learn what creates chaos in your life. Learn what to blow off, and then learn what to hold dear.
Life is a million miniscule acts combined into our own little happiness.
More Tomorrow...
Kelly :0)
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