"The Tapestry of the Human Experience"

Some People Just Don't Get It...

My very intuitive, well-spoken, friendly and fun Facebook friend Wayne started a conversation earlier that quite honestly can't be ignored, or left to disappear under the rubble that is Facebook. With Wayne's permission, I am copying and pasting the conversation. As I'm sure there will be more posts in response to Mr. Rowe's original entry, I will continue to add to this post, as I believe this is a conversation that many people can relate to. If you are one of the non-labeling, unique, beautiful ones, *big kisses and hugs to you*... on the other hand, if you are one of the gossiping, superior pains in the ass Wayne speaks of, get a life... *flips you the bird*... there, now you have something new to bitch about. ;)

Enjoy the posts. I sure am!



Wayne: IF YOU LABEL ME, YOU NEGATE ME ... People who try to label others or themselves don't appear to grasp the complexity of life & the human soul. We are not young or old, straight or gay, black or white, fat or skinny, short or tall, ugly or pretty. We are our own unique collection of intellect, experience, virtu...e, and emotion. This is the tapestry of the human experience.

Kelly (that would be me): Wayne, I love this. It's absolutely true. So many people are so quick to judge, label, put down and bask in their superiority. I truly believe those are the unhappiest people of all. Being unique makes each of us beautiful (or handsome;) and standing out isn't such a bad thing... there are just so many simple-minded people who can't appreciate that. *high-five* to you for calling them out! I LOVE this post!

Wayne: Thanks Kelly! Such an easy thing to spot. Those judging people are out there every day with there label maker putting labels on everyone, when all they had to do was grab a permanent magic marker and write the word "IGNORANT" on their forehead.

Will: Rr you labeling me a simpleton? LOL

Laura: Dude- you know what you are? You are DEEP. (I just labeled you.) And I hate to do this, but in the name of intellectualism I must point out that you labeled people who label people as simpletons and ignorant when people are more complex than that. Good natured ribbing, and I totally get your point but had to say that.

Wayne: Yes I am. LOL I have a Label Baby Jr.

Wayne: Damnit! You and Will are killing me. I am trying to lash out and you masters of lexicon are picking apart my semantics like a government think tank. Dumbing down the meaning with mirrors, magic, and logic. I officially withdraw my simpleton label...due to flawed logic. I hold true to how I feel. (ALL SAID WITH A PARTIAL SMILE AND A FEELING OF WONDERMENT TOWARD 2 PEOPLE I LIKE AND ADMIRE.) Yep, I labeled you a government think tank. :) I will say in all seriousness, the next person that calls me old or refers to me as old, or fat, or whatever I supposedly am, I am going to lose it bad! I don't remember asking anyone what they thought of me. Glad they shared. I am a better and happier person because of their acumen.(This takes a long time to type because I must go to dictionary.com to ensure everything is spelled perfectly or someone will type a correction notice.)

Kelly: Lmfao!!!! The dictionary comment cracked me the hell up! Wayne, with your permission, I would love to post this conversation on my blog. Its priceless, and definitely a subject that sparks a nerve for many folks :) Let me know... And you are NOT old! Or fat! Jeesh! People suck :P Is that labeling? Nah! ;)


Wayne: Go for it Kelly!

Kelly: Woot! You Rock!

Larry: You're intelligent, good looking, and a great friend. Wait, I take that back. Sorry for negating you.

Wayne: Ha, ha, ha... You are pretty cool yourself.

Wayne: Bottom line...most of us have feelings and we know who and what we are. We know our flaws or perceived flaws. We are defined by our own perception and to an extent people around us, at least in their minds. I guess cutting people out of your life that don't have that word filter that keeps you from hurting others is the best medicine. For my part, I try not to label people, but have admittedly done so. For that, I am so sorry.

Kelly: Wayne, I think this is an excellent bottom line. I also try not to label people. We're all only human, and occasionally a label will slip out, or a thought will cross our minds that we're not proud of. I think that's human nature. There are, however, people who have a real problem. I do believe sometimes it's much healthier to cut out those toxic people, and let them meddle in someone else's life. Cutting out those that hurt us doesn't make us mean or judgmental... it keeps us sane. And let's face it, it's much easier to be happy when we're not being watched and judged :)

Tactical... When to Shoot, When to Smile & When to Shut Up... a user's guide to being less-evil

Thank You.

That is my baby's favorite word right now. Give him a piece of paper to color on. Thank You. Change his poopy butt. Thank You. Give him a kiss before bed. Thank You Mom. He'll even yell to me, I'll look over and he'll just say Thank You. It's amazingly adorable, and it makes me feel really, really good.

It doesn't make me happy just because it is so freakin' cute! It amuses me knowing that we, as his parents, have taught him that saying Thank You is not only the right thing to do... it often receives a reaction.

Manners. My 4 1/2 year old twins are lacking compared to Logan. Logan is just a thanker. I truly hope he knows what Thank You means, and he doesn't just love me ogling over him when he says it. Just now... "Mom... marker"... I give him the marker... "Thank You".... and although he will most-likely miss the paper and draw on our graffiti-inspired table, or possibly even the living room carpet (also creatively decorated), he can get away with a lot more... all because of manners.

That brings me to our Walmart greeters. I'm not going to stereotype by saying they are all evil, but let's face the facts, some of them... many of them... are. My husband has befriended a Meijer greeter. Meijer must require smiles during interviews, and they must make sure that the people applying are physically able to pull a single cart out of the herd of carts they are in charge of.

Greeters have several jobs... I realize this... they must un-herd carts (optional), smile (very optional with the likelihood of a smirk or a twitch being 28%), pretend like they care (only if they have time during their shift) and put little stickers of returned merchandise. Sticker-time is the perfect time to feel them out... not feel them up... unless they are hot... and see if they are even capable of engaging in conversation.

One of the pet peeves (near the top) of my increasingly long list of annoyances is people who are paid to greet. I can't tell you how many times I've greeter a Walmart greeter and they haven't greeted back. It pisses me off.

Side Note: Just now Logan asked for water. I gave it to him. Thank You.

So many people need employment right now. I realize Walmart greeters probably make minimum wage, if not only free fountain drinks and pretzel rods. This is no excuse. When you are hired in to greet, you should greet. And management should enforce a niceness policy. The problem is... often management is even pissier than the pissy greeters. Jerk faces!

I'm not only picking on Walmart employees. I also don't appreciate it when we walk into a nice restaurant and the bulimic bleach-blonde, tanned-to-the-hilt 'greeter' gives us the once over, and without speaking, leads us to a table, only to say in a whiny, bitchy voice, "your server will be right with you" ... my response? "I hope he/she is nicer than you... it's a good thing you don't get the tips, cause you'd be one broke bitc.... oh, never mind"...

I grew up on niceness. Mom was always very polite... too polite at times. She admits that now. She finally got sick of people walking all over her. Mom is very assertive today. She is a manager, as am I, and we are both likeably assertive. I've also learned not to let people walk on me, and I love the fact that it's okay to be firm and still be fun! Firmly fun. Hehe!

My whole point is... there is no point in being pissy with the world. Bad days happen. People suck on certain days and then they get better. Bad things happen... mostly to good people. A day of evilness now & then is allowed... but every freakin' day? Seriously! How do you make that okay in your mind? How do you wake up and say "I'm hateful. I will be evil and pissy with as many people as possible today"... that is what we call the reverse of affirmations... assirmations. Say these things in your mirror every morning, and they will make people think you are a complete ass. Feel free to print the following if you need added asspiration... inspiration for mean people:

1) I suck. My life sucks. My job sucks. If I am mean to people, maybe I can make them suck, too!

2) YAY ME! I woke up bitchy for the 120th day in a row! I think I'll shave my legs and cut myself on purpose so I can bitch about it all day.

3) Nobody likes me, everybody hates me, I'm gonna go eat worms.

4) If life were a porno, I'd be the 'go get me a bagel' boy, sent to run errands during every good scene.

5) Bad hair day, my boobs are sagging, I have missing teeth, the teeth I do have are green with fungus. I should go to my greeter job with a scowl on my face and my pistol carefully concealed... and pray I get to use it.

These are only a few of my favorite assirmations. Please email me for more information on learning to be an ass.

In all seriousness, I pride myself on being nice. Yes, there are days when I don't want to smile. I have even been known to yell at people for making me laugh or smile, after promising myself I wouldn't. Some days just suck. All days don't.

People don't deserve what you mean people put them through. The ultimate evil? Talking about someone behind their back and then being polite to their face. Ooooh, you have your own set of assirmations.... you are the ultimate evil.

The good news is, if you are an ass, an evil greeter or just a loather of everyone, including yourself, there is hope. Follow these simple steps and you cannot go wrong:

1) I am a hateful person. I am paid to greet people. If I don't be kind, I'll get fired and stomped upon. (Scare tactic... use regularly for consistent friendliness)

2) I suck. People know that. So if I even smile a little bit, people will wonder what in the hell is wrong with me and talk to me. (The glass is half full tactic. In all honesty, people may be scared half to death if you smile, and run far, far away)

3) People love me. They really, really love me. (The lie tactic... people really don't love you, but it's healthy for you to be delusional)

4) Although I have bad hair, sagging boobs, "summer" teeth and green fungus teeth, there is someone out there for everyone. (The wishful thinking tactic... you are wrong, but bonus! You went from self-loathing to self-loving. Enjoy that, cause that's the only lovin' you're gonna get!)

5) I might never be liked, but at least I'll try. (The Feel-Sorry-For-Yourself Tactic... people still won't like you, but at least you gave it a shot little buddy)

I hope these tricks, tactics, truths and assirmations have helped you in some way. I hope that if you are paid to be nice to people, you will try that. It's a shame that the nice folks have to sit at home and job hunt like an Amish man who hasn't eaten in a week.

Out with the hateful 'greeters' and in with the new.

It was a pleasure serving you today... visit us again soon. (The I don't really mean it but they pay me to say it so I will tactic)

Quietly Confident

I have a pet peeve. I can't stand it when people talk about how they have the most beautiful face in the world, the cutest hair, the prettiest smile they've ever seen or the cutest toenails. I'm all about affirmations, but I'm more about common courtesy. When you say you have guys falling at your feet, and you look so damn hot, you are... quite honestly... losing respect every time you open your mouth.

I'm not one to complain about these things normally, but enough is enough. I've seen it more and more lately. To me, the most attractive people in the world are those who are quietly confident. They walk with their heads held high, radiate a fabulously beautiful glow and make you want to be part of THAT confident crowd... not the crowd that talks about how their ass looks so hot in their new jeans or their new thong is so sweet and adorable. UGH! Most of us quietly confident folks DO NOT WANT TO HEAR IT!

I am NOT a quiet person, but I am quite confident.

That brings me to one of my favorite quotes, written by... me!

Quote: Have you ever noticed that the most attractive people can open their mouths & ruin the whole damn thing?

There is a lot to be said for quiet confidence. You will NEVER hear me say how hot my girls look in a bikini top (though it is my dream to be toned enough to wear one!). I'm not judging the people who do build themselves up. I'm just telling ya sometimes your build up feels like a put-down to others.

Suck it in, stick em out, bat those eyes and sigh... I know... You Are It! Ugh!